Busy day off. Izrina and I working side by side on some things.. I love that. The feeling that I am making progress on a project, and I have someone with me that shares in the work and the goal.
I wanted to do something special afterward. Izrina suggested sandwiches by a favorite wildness spot with water and views. But projects had setbacks and by the time we were ready to get that looked forward to lunch, it was late, and I was starving. So I decided we should just go to a diner or buffet instead. Izrina did that thing she does when she isn’t happy with one of my decisions. She has a way of making it known she isn’t happy, without saying it.. which frankly pisses me off. But I also don’t make decisions based on that.. I reflect first.
I did promise some special time, and she had been such a good girl up until our break. So I decided what the hell, I could wait a little longer for lunch. It would take a while to get the food together, and get to our spot, but patience is a virtue, and a happy slave is something that makes me smile.
Now she had a new problem. She wouldn’t be able to enjoy the time because I wasn’t doing what I wanted to do. Oh boy! Talk about your classic slave mistakes. Usually a Master’s response to questioning a decision is something along the lines of: Since when did you get to decide, what I wanted?
It is a classic problem though. A slave wishes to please. So when a Master decides to say do the cooking.. a slave has to just stand by and accept that if Master wants to do his or her own cooking..so be it. There is always that question running in the back of a slaves mind.. is Master doing this because he or she wants to? That is a bad mistake, but every slave has made it as some point.
If you are dealing with a true Master, one who is honest with themselves and you, and who knows in their heart that they are not allowing themselves to be manipulated, then the answer to that question is always the same. I do what I want. Nothing can change that. If I seek to please my slave, or I choose to do some task myself, it is because I have decided I want to. I will NEVER do something I don’t want to, just because a slave resisted. If I want something, and there is resistance, I will deal with that resistance head on.
Its a tricky thing. We have negotiations, and hard limits, and bad days. Even the most seasoned Master has days when it best to give a wide berth. And slaves are no different. Not that there is a good excuse for leaving your sacred role. The side of your dynamic that feeds your partner is food they need. Yes, outside pressures can influence you and your sacred role. The trick is to not let the outside, reach the inside of your pleasure center, your dynamic.
And then there are the times when the dynamic itself, on the inside is disturbed.. When that which is a constant source of pleasure isn’t right. Like Star Wars.. you feel a disturbance in the force. I happens when you are not sure if you are doing what you should do. Like when you question a Masters decision. You know you should not second guess if the Master served is truly happy with the slave, but you do.
The key, on the slave’s side is to let go of that concern. It is not your concern if the Master makes decisions for their happiness or not. It is simply not your concern. Making decisions is what a Master does and if you are gong to question this, you might not be ready to serve at all. You are there to bring pleasure and service to the Master you serve. Trust this. A person who is a Master in the core of their being, will always use you, within the limits you have negotiated.
The key on the Master’s side is to make good decisions, and then not worry about them. Good decisions will bring good results and bad decisions are part of life.. we use them to learn from. We follow our desire, but also our duty to improve the lives of our slaves. If we want a blowjob, we order it.. no indecision.. no second thoughts. Step up and be a Master or stop calling yourself one. And beyond sex, your slave is there for every desire you have.. if it is not breaking a hard limit, take it when you want it. Your slave is there for your pleasure and service. Be a Master. Many slaves will leave if you do less.
This is our sacred roles. Its not a game. It is not a part time fantasy. For many of us, this is the air we breath, it is what gives us life. Without a partner that understands this need, we are unfulfilled, and hungry. Like a starving animal, we are ravenous for that interaction that fills us with the fire of life.
When you meet someone who fulfills this need, we unlock something deep down inside. And if you strike up a serious relation with someone that has unlocked this need, it becomes a promise. How very sad then for the slave who meets the 90 day Master.. one who is perfect for the first 90 days but can’t sustain the control because after the novelty wears off, so too does the level of attention and control.
That or it become all about sex.. the slave is just there for sex and absolutely none of the rest of it is present.. no concern for the care, development, or improvement of the slave.. none of the work a Master should do. None of those hot little DS moments where its all about the control.
You know you are with a real Master or slave when 90 days later, there is still a desire to give more control, a drive to take more control. This is the time when we see how deep the rabbit hole goes. The truth is, we who desire this, are constantly trying to perfect our oneness.. our connection of wills..
As we drove away from our little picnic, Izrina said: That was nice. I said.. You have to trust that I will always do what I want. We settled into chit chat about this and that. I took a different way home, another little mini-adventure for our day.. no rush. Side roads with lower speed limits. We started to talk about the houses we passed.. which ones we like or didn’t and why. It was a very pleasant day.
Just a few thoughts, brought on by the events of today. Carpe Diem my friends.. be someones great day.