Marry a slave???

If BDSM must be part of your life, and you have not already married, THEN you would accept and train a slave before EVER considered marrying them (assuming you would ever considered marrying your property in the first place). This post is for the folks who haven’t put the cart before the horse.

First the boring parts:

There is an old saying: Why buy the cow if the milk is free? So why would you marry someone if they have already agreed to be your property? Well for practical reasons mostly centered around taking better care of your slave. Any Master worth a lick cares deeply about the care and growth of their slave. As a spouse your slave is better protected regarding company benefits like health care, and inheritance, and social security, etc, etc. Plus the government has an odd way of subsidizing marriage so there are tax benefits. Then there are children. The list of pros is pretty good.

On the negative side, marriage gives your slave leverage should they decide to move towards the nilla side of relations (what I would call the dark side). A slave should NEVER have the upper hand. If you are considering marriage I would strongly recommend investing the money in a good lawyer and draw up a prenuptial agreement that allows the Master to easily exercise an exit strategy, but also provides some fiscal protection for their slave, should they decide to divorce.

But now on to the fun stuff!

A Master should never beg. That is a slave’s mindset. A slave should be appreciative for the gift of a Master’s Domination. THAT is the mindset you really want you and your slave to adopt.

Izrina for example has two rituals and ritual one is performed each day with these words: “May this slave serve the Master she loves and chooses?” This is about confirming her consent but also about reaffirming that Domination is my gift to give, something she must appreciate. When it was time for Izrina to be collared, I made it known that I would accept her request to be collared, and then she asked. Now…

With that in mind the big question becomes.. how does one propose marriage to a slave? I would say there are four possibilities:

  1. A nilla proposal in which the male gets down on one knee
  2. A nilla verson in which the Dominant proposes marriage
  3. A BDSM collaring variation in which the slave respectfully requests a proposal
  4. The Master simply orders his property to marry.

I like the fourth choice. It seems to me that a decision as large as marriage is not any different than any other decision a Master might make for a slave. It is not the size of the decision, it is the principle. Property is property and will do as told. The Master is both owner and decision maker, which in turn makes them responsible for those decisions. A Master owns decisions big and small.

But wait.. Orders may be modified by something significant.. a slaves hard limits. So now we have a new variable to be considered. Before you can order a slave to marry you, it is important to negotiate the terms of marriage.. if you didn’t during training.. which was probably the furthest thing from you mind when you first started training your slave.

Having added marriage to the negotiations of your consensual Master\slave relation the proposal becomes a formality really. I would say however that the formality is significant in the way it sets the tone of this monumental change in your relation. There is something extremely pleasing about a slave on their knees.. both for the Master and the slave. How much more significant and pleasing for a marriage agreement to be conducted in the same manner?

Obviously, this is not some kind of universal rule you must follow under penalty of death by some cabal. Its just my musing, my ideas of what makes the most sense based on my experience and what I have learned about best practices when it comes to training and mindsets between TPE/CNC Masters and slaves.

When and if I decide to marry my slave, be assured it will be her that is on her knees and not me. I love her dearly, but our roles are set. I can not and will not change them. I am her Master. She is my property. Carpe Diem my friends, be someone’s great day.

On your knees, wench!

Last night’s open HOX was nice. The new folks didn’t show so it was a small and cozy group of regulars. That made social distancing easier which is nice what with the surge and all. We did a light bondage workshop, with a subby doing something she never did before: top someone else. Her bottom seemed quite happy.

Monday work over, and I’m back at the house. My slave greeted me at the door on her knees in a dress shirt and nothing else. Nice! Unfortunately I had to get logged right in and check on the status of work before I could do anything with that, though I couldn’t resist running my fingers through her soft pubes. There is just something about the feel, the contact, of stroking someone that is wet and willing. Sure I had to move on but you KNOW I couldn’t just let that go.

So a few minutes later I ordered a rum and coke and when she came back I order her to turn around. She couldn’t see but I had brought out a pair of handcuffs which I slipped on her. Then with the cold steel on her wrists I put her back on her knees.

Kind of hard… Yes me, but also unzipping me with no hands. Call me impatient but I decided to give her a little help with stuffing me into that wet and waiting mouth. Nothing quite compares with a little oral service at the end of a long day.. and its even better with a half naked and restrained slave on her knees.

2020 may have been a bitch but who cares when you have such a wonder wench at your disposal? Carpe Diem my friends, be someone’s great day.


My slave is out picking up pizza and another sub who needs a ride to this months HOX open house. The house is quiet. Princess X, our mini Dachshund is lying in wait under the table hoping for something yummy to fall to the floor. Soon we’ll be telling her to be quiet as new people she’s never smelled before, show up. The driveway lights are on, the signs are out, the dungeon is vacuumed. Nothing left to do but chill and wait for the food and guests to arrive. Funny how life is always go, go, go, … then wait.. Must be a zen thing. Life is teaching us to take it slow internally, even if we look like we are rushing.

Carpe Diem my friends. Be safe. Be someones great day, because at the end of the day, your great day starts that way.

The problem with 24×7

BDSM like any relation really, tends to settle into a comfortable routine. The trick is to swerve off the road once in a while and take a bumpy, bouncy ride down some expected route. That’s not the only thing but it sure helps.

Last night I decided I’d put my slave in her fancy cuffs, do little bondage experimenting, then have her curl up under my arm for a movie. Well, maybe not curl because once the ropes are on, curling up on your side is a little more problematic, but you get the idea.

I decided to go for something a little different this time. A little rope experimentation. Normally I just twist the ropes down the front and back and then run the rest of the rope horizontally back and forth so that it pulls the twists open and creates the lovely diamond shape you always see in rope bondage.

Not this time. This time I put the old brain into high gear and started with a loop at the bottom and worked my way up with each successive horizontal poking up into a fresh loop. That in turn created a completely new pattern. I like it. It’s a little different. I don’t recall ever having seen a pic of rope work quite like it, though I also know there is nothing new under the sun.

Here is how it came out:

I think next time I’ll combine loops in the front with diamonds in the back. Possibly just before she serves supper. Now that’s what i call formal dining!

Carpe Diem my friends! The holiday shoppers are out in droves. Take the challenge and prepare to be patient. Go out and be someone’s great day.

Sir vs Master

My slave curled up under my arm as we drift off to sleep and something came up that after reflecting on it for a while, I thought was worth sharing.

My slave calls me “Master”. I get a warm fuzzy feeling when she says “Yes Master”. I love our life together. I love her submission. There are many moments in the day when our Master / slave relation and its rituals, rules and protocols intrudes into an otherwise normal relation. Those moments often fill me with love and desire for my slave.

So as I was lying beside my slave basking in her submission, I began to think about “Master” and about our early beginnings. When she was in training, back when she was earning her slave name, she called me “Sir”. She had not yet earned the right to call me “Master”.

Our relation was new and exciting and I was always filled with those love and desire feelings whenever she called me “Sir”. Perhaps I was even more enamored with “Sir” back then because the relation was new. Then the day came when I told her that she would no longer refer to me as “Sir”. I was ready to accept her as property and she would call me “Master”.

Here is the funny part that I want to share: At first “Master” seemed hollow and empty. Reflecting on why, I can’t put my finger on it. Maybe I just got used to “Sir”? I don’t know why it happened but I know it did. There was a period where I knew that she HAD to call me “Master” but I wanted to go back to “Sir” because somehow it felt more substantial.

Second revelation: Today if she said “Sir” it would not feel as substantial as being called “Master”. I find that odd. That is the complete opposite of where I was 4 or 5 years ago.

It seems to me that a thing like this should always be what it is and should not change over time. I’ve mulled this over and really do not know why my feelings were what they were or why they changed over time. Maybe it is as simple as familiarity.

We humans do have issues with the strange and unfamiliar. I don’t know. Not really all that important but it is interesting to do these self reflections. Carpe Diem my friends. Be safe, but also be someone’s great day.