Incidents in the Life of a Slave Girl

Over the holidays I have been reading a book by a former slave.   An un-consensual slave.  The author is Harriet Jacobs.    The key point I came away with was how strikingly similar the language of the un-consensual slave owner is with the consensual slave owner.

Harriet was a black woman, and the property of a white man.  At around 15 years of age, Harriet’s Master began to take an unwelcome interest in her.  Harriet’s Master wanted to use her body for sex.  This was in a age when a woman’s virtue defined her worth and value.  She was a strong willed and religious woman and the idea of having her virtue stolen was repelling to her.  He tried everything short of torture.  He even built a house where he promised her that she could live as a free woman, as long as she gave him sex when he wanted.  Harriet had no interest what-so-ever in her owner.  She chose to have sex with another white man, and bore children by him.  Under the laws of that time, her owner had the very real and legal right to torture her until nearly dead, or even kill her.  He did not.  He was a doctor and tried to maintain the respect of the community.  If it got out that he tortured his female slave, to steal her virtue, it might taint his reputation.  So he fumed and plotted but never was able to  force this strong willed woman into submission.

Many other slave were not so lucky.  The tortures many endured is unspeakable.   It was not uncommon for an owner or his sons to use the female slaves as sex toys.  In blunt terms to rape them.. or coerce them into submission.  In turn, you would think the wives of these victims would sympathize with and protect them but instead they tended to hate the victims.  They tended to blame the victims for the sins of their men.  And then there is the greatest atrocity of all.  The children born of these rapes… the sons and daughter of the men who committed these acts.. did not get to live with their fathers like normal children.. no!  Often a Master’s son or daughter would be sold immediately so that they wouldn’t have to see their own genes.. their own offspring.. their own faces and features laboring in the fields for them.

These animals sold their own sons and daughters into slavery, rather than face what they had done.  As if the crime of selling your own children wasn’t evil enough, the daughters would be more fair skinned, basically insuring that their next owner would find them more attractive and therefore more likely to be the next generation of rape and coercion.

If Harriet loved her Master, or if she had been bought by the man who fathered her children, perhaps she would have been OK with being a slave, perhaps not.  Harriet was a strong willed woman.  She didn’t love her Master.  He was much older, she much younger.  Surely there was no physical attraction.  And in this age, even a slave, her virtue was something she wished to protect.  She was compelled by law to be his property.   She had no choice in that.  Even so, she refused to be dragged into a dark corner and used.  Choice is everything.  Consent is everything.   Its why we in the BDSM community make a huge deal of consent violation.  Nothing is more critical to a successful Master-slave relation, then consent.

So often, Harriet’s Master said to her.. you are my property.  I can do as I please with your body.   I say these words myself to my own property.   When these words rolled off the tongue of Harriet’s Master, they were evil.  Yet when they roll off mine, both my slave and I see this as something wonderful.   Where does the difference lie?  What changes these words from evil to warmth, is hard for some to see.  My own slave is often strong willed.  She too often resists my directions.. though never for sex.. its more often a small seemingly insignificant thing. But the fact she CAN raise an objection and have it count is important.  The real key is that unlike Harriet, if my slave reaches an impasse, she is free to leave.

Yes, un-consensual slavery is evil.  Yes, it is wrong to take away a persons liberty, their choices and their freedom.  All around us, there are forces at work all the time which seek to nibble away at our choices.  Your body should not be owned by the invisible collective will of the people we call a government.  Seat belt laws, and motorcycle helmet laws are about forcing you to make choices to protect yourself, but these are also tiny little dents into the decisions you can make, the risks you can choose to make with your own body.  Where does it stop?  If you are dying of lung cancer, and know you faced a slow painful death, drowning a little more each day as blood slowly filled your decaying lungs, shouldn’t it be your choice to do with your life, as you will?  Assisted suicide may be something you oppose, but who are we to tell another what they can or cannot do with their life?    We need to hold onto our freedoms, and not give them away to quickly or easily to the faceless collective we call the government.  Even the small concessions are important, because of that thing we call a slippery slope.

What we need and should have is the right to put our trust in who we choose.  If we choose to turn to another, to give our lives into the protection and custody of a Master, why should that not be allowed?  Certainly our faceless, juggernaut of governmental bureaucracy wants this power.  What gives government the right to TAKE with one hand, our right to consent while at the same time denying us the right to GIVE consent with the other hand?  Wherein does that twisted logic lie?  The nameless, faceless collective we call government feels that taking us into protective custody is its right and perhaps even its duty.  But we as free citizens are not allowed to make the very same choice if we turn to an individual for warm, security and protection.  Wherein lies the difference?  What fundamental right of humanity decrees that governments are the only system by which one person may entrust their well being to another?

Our choices are slowly eroding all around us.  In her chains, my slave finds her freedom but that freedom is not the same as being chained to a faceless bureaucracy that knows only the laws and loopholes of its control legitimized by the laws it creates.  It is in the care, the love, and the trust that we share, that my slave dares give this control to me.  And she knows that at anytime, consent can be withdrawn.   Not so with un-consensual slavery, or its doppelganger cousin,  the overbearing government intrusion that invades every aspect or our lives and choices.

Being in a Master and slave relation is not perfect.  Often there are disagreements.  Just today, I had to put my foot down on a decision regarding Izrina.  In the idealized world, every slave is happy to do Master’s bidding and trots off happily at the next task given.. Happy to serve.  Often it IS that way.  Sometimes it is not.  When it is not, I become like a bulldozer.   I am a juggernaut, an unstoppable force that cannot be moved or avoided.  I will have my way.  Not violently, but steady and persistent.  An unmovable force.  When I am like this, it is for the betterment of the house.. no dishes left in the sink, finances organized, a schedule for visits to the gym.  Since I have come into Izrina’s life, many, many things have improved for her.. especially in areas of health and finance… not because I did for her, but because I compelled her to do for herself.   This is the power of a Master.  This is what we bring into a slaves life.  In the nilla world, I could be a life coach, a trainer, an efficiency expert.  I am all these things and more, to my dear property.

The Master slave life isn’t for everyone.  But systems of power are all around us.  Your parents exercised near total control over your early choices.  Police may issue any command and you are compelled to obey under most circumstances.  Your employer holds incredible sway over your decisions as they are the source of that which provides your food, shelter and clothing.  Military groups may compel you to serve, making your body the legal property of the government.. a very real modern day version of slavery.

Yes, un-consensual slavery is wrong and evil.  But so to is any system of power that removes your right to make decisions about your own body, and your possessions.  It must be a fundamental right of every human to pursue what we choose to believe.. and to give our time and service to that which we believe in.  We need to be conscious always of the choices that are taken away from us, and to fight to keep our freedoms.

Yes, the right to give up our freedom too is a right we must fight for as well, as twisted as that may sound.  We all seek a place in society, at various levels, and we must be free to choose at what level we will serve, and to whom.   Because systems of power are normal, we must be free to choose what we are comfortable with, what systems we will give authority to, and which ones we won’t.

Its not a simple subject.   That which seeks to take without consent is evil.   At its essence, no one has a right to use force to take from us.  We all have a right to use force to protect things from being taken from us.  To paraphrase the latest Star Wars, we don’t win by killing what we hate, we win by protecting what we love.

Yeah, it takes thought to figure out what you want, and what contributions you will make to help shape the forces around us.  Never forget that true happiness comes when you are a source of happiness.  When you are someones great day, your own great day is assured.  As you fight the good fight to hold onto your right to choose, never forget that to give is to receive.







10 thoughts on “Incidents in the Life of a Slave Girl

  1. I must say a very interesting article indeed. When we speak of modern slavery it is certainly consensual for the most part. With our government in our lifestyle consensual really means nothing. It means two adults cannot make a decision to live the life they choose. I happen to find this to be really ignorant when you take a look at whats going on today in Washington.

    Back to the slavery we use consensual non consensual in our everyday terms , but it is not always about consensual , a great deal in my mind can be labeled as non consensual.

    Before I met Arianna I was single for some 3 years , this was due to me refusing to settle for less in what I wanted in a partner. When meeting someone I would pass a check list to a potential partner and if one of my needs were said NO to , I would finish the date and just part ways. When we settle for less we are only happy for a very short time , relationships like that tend not to last to long.

    We do have some forms of what some may call consensual but the non consensual come in at sex, sex is on my terms and it means I can do anything I want when I want and how I want without question and this was agreed to. When it comes to play , the play is on my terms again anything and anywhere I want the only thing I agreed to was not to cause any physical harm..

    There are forms of non consensual slavery in today’s times , those who are sold into slavery and I suppose even in vanilla relationships and even D’s as well as M;s

    Just my thoughts.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. You practice what some call CNC.. Consensual non-consent. Your slave has given you free rein. She has trusted your judgement. She has left in your hands, the decisions about what you will and will not do and trusts that ultimately you may hurt her, but never harm her. If asked, I would say that you can do this, because you chose wisely. People who do not, will have a problem because consent will get in the way of what they want.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. The comparison has me wondering if the people who choose to back such government actions aren’t secretly hoping for an entity to take such control from them. They feel overwhelmed with how fast the world is changing and don’t know where else they can turn to for that comfort of giving up their cares and responsibilities.

    Essentially they’d rather be told they can’t do these things rather than having to critically think about it and explain their actions to others as their own choices.

    The logic has to be twisted in some strange way to make sense to them. I’m still trying to figure out what said logic must be though.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I absolutely believe that people gravitate toward the dominant side or the submissive side to some degree or other. Or they tend to have a little of each in different parts of their life. I believe that people who tend to the submissive side, which want someone to step in and take care of them lean towards the left. People who want to run their own show, and want no one interfering lean towards the right. I put forth that theory a long time ago, It’s in the vote area, top of the page.. though I didn’t’ get a large enough response to really tell anything.


  5. To take care of , the submissive or slave brings on a great deal of responsibility , far greater than the average vanilla household.
    You are correct our relationship is based on a CNC but this was agreed upon prior to me agreeing to enter a relationship with Arianna.

    Again we as humans are impatient , we want it now , there are no compromises in the way we think. We as humans need that companionship even if we know its wrong or we are not really compatible, all we know is it works for that moment in time.

    Negotiations are so important when entering our way of life , after all it is the submissive or slave who must adapt to our ways, but first we must make sure they are adaptable. Wow that is deep.

    If they are not adaptable and we bend meaning giving in to our needs and going for that companionship it will not work , crash and burn. Who is at fault ? it is always the slaves fault never the master, but the master broke his own protocol and went straight for the companionship.

    It took me years to realize it was I who was making these mistakes , my failures were indeed my fault and I had no one to blame but me.

    Over a period of a month I sat and pictured what I wanted my life to look like , I pictured what type of slave I wanted in my life , then I thought about my needs and my needs only , what is it I wanted in a relationship so I could be complete.

    I sat down and I began to type , finishing I had 2 full pages and pouring myself a glass of brandy going back over what I had typed , I realized I had added more than what my true needs were so back to work and my final piece was about a half a page.

    Over a period of 2 years I remained single , but dating nothing serious and most of the time only one date with a slave.

    Each one after reading my needs list just looked at me with this crazed look , like are you fucking serious?

    See I refused to bend , I refused to give in , even if it meant staying single.

    I met Arianna and the first time I laid eyes on her I was like fuck me running. I thought to myself before we even spoke I do not stand a chance in hell.

    I had a roommate at the time not because I needed the money but because of the companionship , see I am human. When Arianna left after our first meeting Kelly said there is no way in hell you will pull that bitch in. I said hold my beer and sit back and just watch.

    I am getting to the point , I am long winded so here we go.

    After we had agreed to see if we were even somewhat compatible, here I pulled my list out with a lot of hesitation. I was basing or my thoughts were now purely sexual and I did not want to fuck anything up but I began to read my list, the now list I read from my mind looking at her straight in the eyes.

    Once I finished , Arianna said yes she could comply and was looking forward to a relationship but and there is always a but , Arianna had her own list and after listening I had to take a few days taking everything in because her list was much deeper than my own. This was the first time the word Micromanage had ever come up. Did I want that type of responsibility ? Did I want that much control? Could I even maintain such a relationship? Could I remain consistent ?

    Here was a slave who had agreed to every need I needed in order for me to be happy in a relationship and I was having seconds thoughts.

    Now 5.5 years later our life still continues to grow and it grows stronger everyday , the bond we have is truly incredible. She knows me , she understands me and she also makes a great PR slave because of how forward I can be with some people she cleans up stuff.

    You cannot settle for less in life because you only have one.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. As a sub, I loved the thought of “True happiness comes when you are a source of happiness.” That should be the goal of any slave in a BDSM relationship. It was a very interesting article, and many points made me stop and think. Thank you for writing it.


  7. I know that it wasn’t until I read that book, that I actually realized that there were sons and daughters who were sold into slavery by their fathers. That was an unpleasant epiphany.

    I wouldn’t limit getting happiness, by giving happiness to just subs. As an owner, I find that I derive great pleasure in seeing my slave happy… Of course I can still be greedy and use my girl for my pleasure, but we are compatible.. what pleases me, most often pleases her.

    I am please you visited, and took the time to comment.


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