I suspect that more than one clever slave has quite consciously trained a Master. Maybe the owner wants oral service, but they nurse secret feelings of being too greedy by demanding this, and the slave knows this is a “button”, so they quietly and quite consciously press it. Or maybe they put up a fuss about this or that until it was just too much of a pain in the ass for their owner to make them do it… gasp.. broke a cardinal rule there..
I said “their owner”. A slave doesn’t own an owner, therefore an owner cannot be “theirs”. Ha! I love the semantics we play in Ds. But semantics are all bullshit, right? Or no? Times up! No was the correct answer.
Many a Dominant approach people like bulldozers.. My way or the highway. That approach doesn’t take much thought and you can get lazy about observing people and their motivations when this is your way of interacting. Many a slave are about pleasing people, and as such are quite adept at reading body language, facial expressions and such. This can sometimes result in the slave, being more adept than a Master at reading a person’s “triggers”.
It only takes a few seconds thought to see that it is quite possible for a clever slave to make an owner believe that they are in charge when in fact the slave is out thinking and out manipulating the owner.
For example, a dedicated Dominant might have very strong feelings about not placing demands on their slave that impact their health. They may not make demands based on a bad back, or bad knees, or migraines, or any number of health issues. And a clever slave may exaggerate the degree of their suffering, to lessen the demands an owner may place on them. An responsible owner will feel guilty questioning if they are exaggerating, and there is another button to press..
A quick and simple test to see if this is happening, is simply to look at the standing orders and the Dominants satisfaction with these orders. If things are not getting done, and the Dominant is showing entirely too much patience leading to frustration with the situation that is a red flag.. an indicator that maybe the Dominant isn’t really in charge. Or maybe, there is a health problem… Ok.. not so simple…
You see what I did there? I started with a simple rule.. then removed it. It goes back to observing your slave and doing some original thinking. There is no simple formula. You have to be a thinking person, give time and thought to your charge, and to your dynamic, and decide for yourself.. are you being trained by your slave? I suspect this happens more often than Masters know or would like to admit.
And the truth be told, while a slave may get over on a Master, it is very deeply disappointing to a real slave. They WANT someone capable of seeing and defeating all their games. If you can’t be smarter.. be more reliable.. never deviate from your desires. It’s not all bad.
Your typical Dominant is going to settle for more of this than a TPE Dominant. A total power exchange owner however is going to demand what they demand and are not going to be flexible about it.. usually.
A slave I know had cancer and her owner still had her doing chores and protocols and service. Some others asked, why are you doing this and he said.. She needs this. Now what you dear reader need to understand is that often we treat Cancer patients like they will break and what they often need is to be treated like anyone who faces a challenge. They need a trainer who will push them to do better, and more than they would if they didn’t have a trainer. When I say trainer, think of being in a gym.. and having a trainer that keeps pushing for one more exercise..
A good Dominant will also more often than not, correctly judge the times to be flexible, and the times to not be flexible. Like a personal trainer in a gym, they will push you to painful places you would not push yourself, but afterwards you will feel a sense of accomplishment.. which is why you submit to a trainer in the first place.
What good would a trainer in a gym be, if you said.. I just had a big breakfast and I feel all bloated and I just don’t feel like doing two hours on the high setting on the treadmill today…let’s do thirty minutes on medium.. What good would that trainer be if they accepted that? None! Well a good Dominant is the same. They don’t allow topping from the bottom, but they are not inflexible either. A great Dominant is at least as intelligent as their property, when it comes to reading the clues in body language and such, and can figure out the difference between a problem and an excuse.
That being said, not all Dominants are going to be a good fit for every slave. Some will be smarter than you and some will not. Some will have the required ability to keep you on your toes, so that you don’t harbor a feeling that you are really the one in charge.. and some will not. Oh.. even if you do find your ideal sapiosexual match, it doesn’t mean you won’t get one over on them once in a while.. but for the most part, you will feel that their gift of Domination is the complete package, and be happy to trust in their judgement, leadership, and training.. because you know exactly who is really in charge.
I’ve known a woman or two who were sapiosexual. That works for me.. though once.. I tried to show my intelligence with such a woman and fell on my face. Never try to reach. Be yourself. If its going to be, it will. Don’t push. Let it come to you. The secret to great attraction is to come just far enough to make your desire known… then wait.
Carpe Diem my friends. Go be your hot self….