A second last Bacardi in Vegas

So, I am here in Vegas sipping my Bacardi and coke, packed and ready for the long haul home tomorrow.  I’ve read a few blogs, answered a question or two, and now my mind as turned to the subject.. what to write about tonight…

Tonight, I just want to say it.. I’m a dick.  Not your ordinary dick, but a dick none-the-less.  One of my first acts I undertook during the weekend while MasterB and slave Kit were here with me was to have a new fan installed in our bathroom.  Why? because I am a dick.. and good isn’t good enough.  If it ain’t right, I’m going to speak up.

Sometimes when a person is down, I don’t console them.  If I think they are wallowing in self-pity or blaming another when they stink of shit too.. I’m going to say something.  That is because I’m a dick.

Sometimes, I just show no empathy what so ever for what my slave is going through, and make her do shit she really, really doesn’t want to.  Then again, I do that because I’m a dick.

In another sense, I am a dick because I am a man and like most men I can often be defined by my dick.  Truth be told, Johnson and I are really tight.  My dick doesn’t rule me but damn near.  I need at least one orgasm a day and I will have it, even if I have to take care of it myself..  Having a dick can be a bit like having spidey senses.. when it starts tingling you know that some action isn’t far off.

The thing about being a dick is, karma.  Karma just loves to give you back the dick you gave.  Today, I was handed.. quite literally… courtesy of a men’s room soap dispenser, a reminder that I am a dick..

Dick

I know I shouldn’t have my camera out in the men’s room but I had to shoot this…   Then I didn’t really want to wash it off.. but then I also didn’t want to grind it into the next hardy hand shake..

Soon I will be home and then I can make a creamier version.. and put it somewhere even less appropriate.  At least that version can be licked off.

Striking Art….

I’ve been walking past this painting each day

Asher_Hung-Spotlight

The plaque says the artist is Asher Hung and the title is “Spotlight”.

I want to replicate this but in this way..  Two beautiful women in long red robes on either side, and me walking in, wearing red leather pants and a red leather vest.

There is something incredibly Ds hot about his art.. the notion of two attendants of the opposite sex, standing in attendant repose, as a very strong and Dominant figure walks between them, dressed in garb instantly recognized as sexy…

Yeah.. I want to reproduce this with a twist..

The king, in Las Vegas…

One for the money, two for the show, three to get ready..

No disrespect, man, but there is a new King in Las Vegas, and we call him MasterX.


Hobnobbing with Vice Presidents, and giving lessons over a pool table can give you an inflated ego.  Thank goodness mine was pre-inflated or it might be an issue.  Doing really well here today.

I had the opportunity to meet with some captains of my industry, and I would say I didn’t make an ass of myself, so that’s good.  There is that favorite quote of mine.. Better to remain silent and thought a fool than speak up and remove all doubt.  yeah.. I don’t roll like that.  I talked with a girl from college that was working to make ends meet.. which meant she served me my dinner.. and the clearly gay guy who sold me the drink to mix with Bacardi tonight, and in both cases I was.. well.. gregarious.

I tend to push on people, bring them out, and make them smile.  It’s my Master side of the slave in all of us, wishing to serve humanity, each according to our sacred role.  Grinning now.. didn’t so such a good job though when that lady who gave me the evil eye for lambasting Kit.  But that was a thing from across the room. I bet if she came over and actually talked with me, I could have gotten a smile out of her.


 

So now I am back in my room and feeling a million feet tall..   In that feeling my friends is a lesson for every new Dominant out there.  And slave for that matter.  Do I miss Izrina?  Hell yes.. like a dull throbbing in my nether regions.. wait. that’s something else..  yes.. I miss her deeply and passionately.  But I am who I am and i can’t stop being who I am, and I discover ways to be who I am, with or with our Izrina being present.

At first this sounds like a betrayal, but its not.  You need to understand that to love someone is to bring your happiness to them so that joy is multiplied.  If you NEED someone else to find happiness, then you are sucking at them, pull all of your happiness from them like a leech, and this is destructive.  Not that I don’t want Izrina to want and need me, I do.  But I would have her find her happiness with or without me.. I want her to always find her happiness.  Its the Masterly thing to do.

Slaves with and without Master’s need to know that their lives have value.. that somewhere out there is someone who will get hard or wet at the opportunity to offer their domination.. because they can see you are a good slave.  Yes, if you have this, they will see it, and they will come.  It doesn’t matter if you are a little fat, or old, or whatever…  A true Master loves a challenge, an opportunity to take a consensual slave and and remold them into the perfect slave for them.

If I told Izrina once I’ve told her a million times.. I want her to find her happiness in being a slave, no matter if she is with me or not.  Speaking of which.. she is doing something very unslave like and joining the girls for a night in a bar tomorrow.  Thank goodness she’s a good girl, and when she’s not it because I made her that way.

Still I worry about “nilla girls nights out”.  I think this is potentially a bad influence.  Entirely too many women.. and men.. see the opposite sex as the enemy they have to use and endure.. yeah.. bad influence that.  She must report on her way to the bar, and every hour at the bar, and when she is leaving..  I see it as a lifeline back to our way of life.  The choice of course to be a slave is and always will be hers because this is above all else, consensual.

But back to Master and slaves and the value we should see in ourselves…

I can’t stress this strongly enough.  We must find our own happiness, and know that we have personal value, before we can be ready to enter into a healthy relation.  And if you have only one of these, and are subservient enough, a Master can unleash in you the rest.   You just have to find the real Masters.. the ones who are not in it to get their cocks sucked, who can’t sustain if for more than 90 days.  You need a Master who knows they are a Queen..  or a King.. maybe of Vegas.. wait.. there is only one of me..

Carpe Diem my friends.. Be someone’s great day!

 

 

No big, in Vegas

Well, I’m exhausted.   With all the travel, and then early starts for work followed by late nights with my friends from LA, I am a bit tuckered out.  Yeah, I’m in Las Vegas, and it sounds cool and all, but somewhere around 4 I hit a wall and its all I can do to keep up my energy levels.

Strange how once I can relax, I suddenly don’t need rest as much.  So here I am, instead of collapsing into a nice slumber, typing away at the desk in my room.

Outside my window, the sky is blue and far off in the distance, grey mountains surround this unnaturally green valley we call Las Vegas.  I think, with all the water poured into this valley, and the trees, and all  the waste water that is discarded into the ground, I wonder how long it would take this valley to revert to its natural desert state if mankind just suddenly disappeared tomorrow?

I can see the tarmac I landed on, and beyond there truly is a lot of lush green which I can only assume are trees.  We humans are truly amazing.. and scary.  This is all so… .temporary.. held together by our engineering and refusal to accept the impossible.


 

So..  what to write about tonight?  On one hand, there is my slave whom I miss terribly.  But there are also the many things that happened while MasterB and his dear slave were here.

MasterB wanted to hand off his slave into my care for a few hours.  Not an unusual task.  I have done the same with Izrina.  Just to be clear though, this is not like a stranger asking to “borrow” your slave for some scene or sex.  This is a trusted friend you are giving your slave into the care of, for the purpose of creating a deeper sense of being property.  Since I am mentoring MasterB, I have advised him to think carefully about just loaning out his slave.  I tend to be more like Vile on this one.  My slave is not for use by anyone else.  I might give a slave into the hands of a trusted friend for training.. but not for use.

Let me make some observations about how it went with this training under a different Master.

First, it concerned me, as it should concern anyone that does this, that your slave might develop feelings for the temporary Master.  I was careful to keep my controls simple, and not too intense.

For example there was a period at a buffet, where I told his slave to get me orange juice with a splash of apple juice and she came back with just apple juice, stating they had run out of orange.  Now I knew that there was another station and I asked if she had checked for one.  She had not.  So I asked if she truly cared about me or the quality of her service.. about serving me properly.. Now if you know anything about slaves, when you start down this road of accusing them of not caring about their service it can cause a lot of self inflicted doubt and self inflicted pain.  I could see that if I pushed this, I could easily have made her cry, and I backed off, then sent her on another errand.  I used this as an opportunity while she was away to speak with MasterB about “triggers” that slaves have and how to use them, and when we should be careful not to tread to heavily.

A funny thing about that story.. this lady in the booth across from me, heard me reprimanding MasterB’s slave and gave me the evil eye… How dare I scold a full grown woman?  She was probably thinking.. you bastard.. get your own fucking orange juice.  Funny.  Ds in public can be a challenge at times.

All in all though, it was a pleasant evening.  At one point as I was commanding her, I got an erection.  It was then that I handed her back to MasterB.   I was enjoying commanding her way too much and knew I was the one crossing lines..  Not that I have control over what Johnson does.. but if I am interacting with someone other than Izrina, and he wakes.. well that’s just inappropriate and its time to back out of what ever it is I am doing.

I thought about that a lot.  There was no inappropriate action on my part, and yet I can’t shake the feeling of being inappropriate.  Maybe I am substituting embarrassment for inappropriate.   Its not the first time I’ve felt this either.  I think I’ll stop here before I get myself in trouble.  The chance to command presents itself all the time and it is after all the air I breath.

The take away from this should be that for people into Ds, you don’t need to have sex to be excited.  Someone whipsering “Sir” or “Master” can sometimes trigger a reaction in me.   Never under estimate the attraction of Ds.  It can be a very powerful thing.  To their credit, MasterB and his slave had already considered and discussed this in advance.  I’m proud of both of them.


Like any married couple, MasterB and his slave probably have times when they are less excited with each other than they would like to be.  It happens.  Especially in marriage and forgive my prejudice, but especially in nilla marriage.  Thank God they switched to Ds!  We spoke of how they could both be happier together, and the steps needed to make that happen.  I truly hope my contributions to their lives helps them fall deeper in love.

We wrapped up our last night together, watching the movie “secretary”.  I did a running commentary on it, and MasterB’s slave had lots of questions.  It was nice.. the discussion of where the actors did well together, where they made mistakes, and what would have been a better way to handle things.  Its just a story, but it makes good material for reference in real lives.


I wish I could have talked with my own slave more.  I have these long days with no breaks and when i do have a break, she’s not free..and visa-versa.  I haven’t had a chance to tell her any of this yet.  Reading this, may be the first time she gets these stories.

Now that all that is off my chest and this latest update is winding down, I am really missing Izrina.  I wish she was here.  I wish I had the chance to do things with her, that made me hard.  Damn it.


One last observation.  MasterB and his slave treat me like I am someone to look up to.  I am OK with that, within reason.  Again, I reflected on this. I am really just a regular guy.  Or at least I am in mind.

I’ve been doing this so long, that when I tear into a slave for misbehavior, its not really a big deal.. its just what I do.  The hard edges that some people see in me.. the way I treat a woman as property.. they see as an abuser.. like the woman across from us at the booth. Note: I recognize slaves as men or women.. but I said “woman as property” because it has a stronger impact for most people.

For me this “abuse” is just another day as a Master.  Its no big deal.  And I forget this at times.  When I get all Master like, I forget sometimes the impact it has on others.  So I asked MasterB and his slave not to glorify me or put me on a pedestal.  I am just another guy.

It may not make sense right now.  But one day MasterB will be talking with a brand new Master who will be in awe of him.. and then it will makes sense in a very personal way..  One day his slave will talk with a brand new slave and it will all be new and suddenly she will reflect back on the years, remember my words, and it will make sense.

This life we lead isn’t kinky at all for us.  Its who we are.  and sometimes we forget that what is normal for us is kinky for other.  Dual lives.. its a problem.


Now the sky has turned purple and orange as the sun sets..  I am really missing Izrina.  Carpe Diem my friends..  go love someone, if you can.  Viva Las Veags!

 

 

Observing people in airports

I am in Vegas.. I did my people watching thing during transit.

Sometimes I see an older couple and I think how sweet. This was not one of those couples. He sat next to his wife who tapped with angry fingers into her phone. His face was worn and his mouth turned down ever so slightly at the ends. He sat impassively and I thought. Here is stone in a stream which has rode the currents of his steam so long, been tossed and tumbled so long, that all the sharp edges have been worn smooth.

I wanted to ask, been married long? But I suspected I knew the answer already: Too long. Not sure if my impertinence would be release humor or suppressed anger so I remained uncharacteristically silent.

It’s a funny thing, observing people who show no signs of affection for each other and yet simultaneously give you the impression they would never leave each other, is puzzling.

What makes a couple settle for daily pin pricks at each other, both seemingly miserable, and yet perhaps secretly happy with this odd love-hate relation?

It’s like two switches with equal part sadist and masochist have found each other. All I know is I have no right to judge. I might observe, even reflect to understand, but judge no. Each to his own. This is a critical thing all humanity needs to embrace if we are to make a better world.

And we of the BDSM community should understand this better than anyone..  To outsiders, all they know is, we hurt the ones we love.  We belittle and degrade them, and we use and abuse them.  From our perspective, nothing could be farther from the truth, but its where we are coming from, its how we see things that turns everything 180 degrees around.  Just as i would have other who cannot understand why I would own another person.. or that person would even want to be owned, I accept that what looks like a miserable life may in some way fulfill these people.

It goes back to my thoughts on Charlottesville.  We have two ears but only one mouth.  There is a reason. We all need to listen more, and speak less.  How arrogant are we when we assume we have all the answers for other peoples lives?



A quick shout out to the lovely Chinese couple who sat next to me on that long flight in from Philly ot Vegas.  I deeply appreciate our conversations.  You made the trip seem shorter.


To my side was a young. well young for me, gentleman of 30 years of age and his charming young lady.  Originally he and she were both from China.  We talked about every subject you can imagine.  From wages, to politics, to rockets, to love and life, we never seemed to run out of interesting subjects.

At one point I was asked what social media I followed.  None, I said.  I could hardly talk about Fet on the plane.  So I gave them information to find his site with a warning, “you may find this weird”.  I am very curious what they thought after they got around to finding these pages.  Wish I could have been less mysterious, and given frank answers, but trapped as we were for hours, with all those other people, I thought it best to let them draw their own conclusions.

Carpe Diem my friends.. make a better world.

Viva Las Vegas

Tomorrow I’ll leave the house around 8am and get in Vegas around 7pm.. which will be 10pm here.   I am going to be one jet weary M.  Gotta four hour lay over in Philly.  Must remember to bring a book this time.

I miss my slave already and haven’t even left yet.  Wish I was bringing my most prized possession with me.  sigh.  Think I’ll buy coke and Bacardi right after I unpack.

Charlottesville, Virginia

I was driving in my car to work and my brain was doing that rambling thing it does when I just let it jump from thought to thought.  The subject was Charlottesville and all the controversy there.  And yes, occasionally I let my brain off its leash.

I thought what I might say to a person, on either side of the aisle.  So I began to craft well thought out responses and as I rehearsed these speeches in my head, in each scenario I played out, I realized that I would be shouted down before I could get out enough words to make my point.

So I whittled away at my words, trying hard to get my core message out in as few words as possible, something I could interject before I was shouted down.  My core statement was.. “stop the hate” but even that was not sufficient.  Even then, the response might be.. I am not the person who started this.. “they” did.

Shouting out just “stop” would only encourage more aggression with some people hell bent on “fixing” things.  “Stop” might lead to a shout.. tell “them” to stop. What can you say to people hell bent on changing the world that will make them pause and really think about what they are doing?

I watched a news report the other day of a hundred plus year old statue being ripped down and then people ran up and kicked it.  I thought about the emotions of the person kicking that statue..  What drives a person to kick a metal statue?

I thought about ISIS blowing up thousand year old carvings, about their destruction of history.  I had quickly condemned THAT act of stupidity.  I questioned how  this was any different.  Somewhere, one city was moving its Civil war stuff into museums.. I liked that idea. A good balance between washing away the past, and preserving it.

In Germany, many artifacts from the Nazi party have been defaced and removed.  Its the same thing.. a desire to erase something, but in the process it also destroys something we can learn from.  Mistakes provide one of our greatest tools of learning, once you can get past the embarrassment of embracing the fact that mistake really happened.

So I turned again to the question.  If faced with a conversation with someone that would shout me down.. what one word would I try to get out?  Many two word combinations came up… stop hating..  you’re wrong..  come together (the Beatles Song starts in my head).

Maybe it is expecting too much, to think that people that are hell bent on changing things can stop to reflect in a calm rational way when faced with that which they oppose.

Bigotry and prejudiced it was said, doesn’t have two sides.  That’s true.  But what happened there was definitely two sides coming at each other.  If it wasn’t two sides of bigotry and prejudice, what was it two sides of?   That question hung in my mind.

We as a country rejected the notion that there were two sides to this.. so what then is the answer?  I thought again of the picture in my mind of that statue being kicked.  What those people needed was a dance party.  I know, it sounds stupid but when you close your eyes and just let your body move to a beat, you lose yourself and you don’t care who you dance next to.  You don’t care who else is in the crowd, or what their race, religion, or sex is.  Its just you and the music.

What one or two word could I get out, before I was shouted down?  I think it best to just point at the person doing all the shouting.. and say.. hater.  I am pointing out that you are hating right now.  If you can’t sit and listen, if you have to shout someone down, you have lost the ability to interact peaceably.  You are hating.  Hating someone who hates makes you a hater too.

Every answer I find, has a counter point.  How do you get people hell bent on fixing things to take a breath and respect other views?  What one or two words might I get out?

I think you don’t try interjecting.  .  I think most of this goes away when we stop talking about “us and them”, and start talking and more importantly listening, to a real conversation between “me and you”.  It doesn’t matter what you believe or how righteous or wrong your argument may be.  There is a reason you have two ears but only one mouth.  We all need to hold our tongues more, respect more, even when we disagree. Mostly, we have to be strong in our convictions, but listen more than we speak, and never hold hatred.  Hatred is a poison the harms the one who holds it.

Maybe my one word would be.. Carpe.

A slaves mistake

That last blog fired up my memories,  and my creative writing juices…


 

The dungeon was painted in dark colors, but warm people mingled about food and drinks that was laid out for this gathering, and on the couches and seats spread about the place.  He stood, mostly alone, mostly looking down.  An awkward solitary figure, painfully unsure of what he was doing there.

Everything about him screamed discomfort in this social setting.  His hands were clasped in front of his waist and as people walked by, he would look up briefly, not really making eye contact.  He moved constantly, trying to never be in anyone’s way, at any time.  But he listened attentively all of the time, so that if he were addressed, he would not miss it.

When he did look up, it was as a beaten puppy might look up at its Master, unsure if it was forgiven yet for the thing is was still not sure it had done wrong.  So too, this man seemed constantly in fear for the infraction he might break, not knowing what action he might take that might suddenly make him worthy of punishment and correction.

So it was, when a stunning Mistress, her flesh barely clad in leather that revealed every sweet curve of her body, strode across the room to approached him, he fairly trembled.  I offer you, she said, my Domination this evening.  Will you accept and negotiate this arrangement?

The man stammered, staring down at her boots and he fidgeted,  the words struggled to form in his dry mouth.  I... he stammered in a low voice…  am not worthy.  You might think he could now relax, having shown this Goddess that he was in fact a worm unworthy to lick her boots.  But he had fallen into the most hideous mistake a new slave can make.

She narrowed eyes and it felt to him as if her gaze burned into his soul.  She laid a hand on his shoulder, and then turned suddenly.. to the crowd.  Excuse me.. she said in a loud voice..  The room went silent.  The attention was a fire that consumed the slave and he wished that he could be permitted to simply fall to her feet and hide there.   I offered this slave my Domination, she said.. and then turned again to face him, her gaze causing him to tremble.  She leaned in close and in a low voice said.. And what was your response?

Her question was like a hiss escaping fangs that would tear him apart. He wished now that he had not come here this night, but the room and this Mistress demanded he speak.. I said, he croaked, I am not worthy.  The Mistress turned again to the room.  Can anyone here tell me, she asked, what is wrong with that statement.  An older male Master spoke up.. It was never his decision to make.

Exactly! said the Mistress.  She turned again to the slave who struggled not to tremble.  Who are you, to tell me if you are worthy or not?  That is my decision, my choice to decide who is worthy of receiving my domination.  She spoke in stern tones, admonishing him in front of this crowd.   Yes Mistress, he managed to say.  Come, she said, come sit beside me and we will talk.  The slave allowed himself to be led off.  He was chastened, but seemingly happy to have survived the ordeal, and even more so to be in the company of this woman who twisted him in delicious ways.

So it is, so often with new slaves.  The presumption to know what a Master or Mistress is thinking, what they might want, how to please them.  Nor would this be the last time this scenario would play itself out with new actors.  It is a curious thing, the way a Dominant will get inside a slave and wring out emotions, leaving only a happy and compliant pet behind.  It is a thing of interest, that each gets back something they need from these exchanges.  Such is the way we work.. Masters and slaves..

Carpe Diem my friends.. go find yourself.

Questioning Master

Busy day off.  Izrina and I working side by side on some things.. I love that.  The feeling that I am making progress on a project, and I have someone with me that shares in the work and the goal.

I wanted to do something special afterward.  Izrina suggested sandwiches by a favorite wildness spot with water and views.  But projects had setbacks and by the time we were ready to get that looked forward to lunch, it was late, and I was starving.  So I decided we should just go to a diner or buffet instead.  Izrina did that thing she does when she isn’t happy with one of my decisions.  She has a way of making it known she isn’t happy, without saying it.. which frankly pisses me off.  But I also don’t make decisions based on that.. I reflect first.

I did promise some special time, and she had been such a good girl up until our break. So I decided what the hell, I could wait a little longer for lunch.  It would take a while to get the food together, and get to our spot, but patience is a virtue, and a happy slave is something that makes me smile.

Now she had a new problem.  She wouldn’t be able to enjoy the time because I wasn’t doing what I wanted to do.  Oh boy!  Talk about your classic slave mistakes.  Usually a Master’s response to questioning a decision is something along the lines of: Since when did you get to decide, what I wanted?

It is a classic problem though.  A slave wishes to please.  So when a Master decides to say do the cooking.. a slave has to just stand by and accept that if Master wants to do his or her own cooking..so be it.  There is always that question running in the back of a slaves mind.. is Master doing this because he or she wants to?  That is a bad mistake, but every slave has made it as some point.

If you are dealing with a true Master, one who is honest with themselves and you, and who knows in their heart that they are not allowing themselves to be manipulated, then the answer to that question is always the same.  I do what I want.  Nothing can change that.  If I seek to please my slave, or I choose to do some task myself, it is because I have decided I want to.  I will NEVER do something I don’t want to, just because a slave resisted. If I want something, and there is resistance, I will deal with that resistance head on.

Its a tricky thing.  We have negotiations, and hard limits, and bad days.  Even the most seasoned Master has days when it best to give a wide berth.  And slaves are no different.  Not that there is a good excuse for leaving your sacred role. The side of your dynamic that feeds your partner is food they need.  Yes, outside pressures can influence you and your sacred role.  The trick is to not let the outside, reach the inside of your pleasure center, your dynamic.

And then there are the times when the dynamic itself, on the inside is disturbed.. When that which is a constant source of pleasure isn’t right.  Like Star Wars.. you feel a disturbance in the force.  I happens when you are not sure if you are doing what you should do.  Like when you question a Masters decision. You know you should not second guess if the Master served is truly happy with the slave, but you do.

The key, on the slave’s side is to let go of that concern.  It is not your concern if the Master makes decisions for their happiness or not.  It is simply not your concern.  Making decisions is what a Master does and if you are gong to question this, you might not be ready to serve at all.  You are there to bring pleasure and service to the Master you serve.  Trust this.  A person who is a Master in the core of their being, will always use you, within the limits you have negotiated.

The key on the Master’s side is to make good decisions, and then not worry about them.  Good decisions will bring good results and bad decisions are part of life.. we use them to learn from.  We follow our desire, but also our duty to improve the lives of our slaves.  If we want a blowjob, we order it.. no indecision.. no second thoughts.  Step up and be a Master or stop calling yourself one.  And beyond sex, your slave is there for every desire you have.. if it is not breaking a hard limit, take it when you want it.  Your slave is there for your pleasure and service.  Be a Master.  Many slaves will leave if you do less.

This is our sacred roles.  Its not a game.  It is not a part time fantasy.  For many of us, this is the air we breath, it is what gives us life.  Without a partner that understands this need, we are unfulfilled, and hungry.  Like a starving animal, we are ravenous for that interaction that fills us with the fire of life.

When you meet someone who fulfills this need, we unlock something deep down inside. And if you strike up a serious relation with someone that has unlocked this need, it becomes a promise.  How very sad then for the slave who meets the 90 day Master.. one who is perfect for the first 90 days but can’t sustain the control because after the novelty wears off, so too does the level of attention and control.

That or it become all about sex.. the slave is just there for sex and absolutely none of the rest of it is present.. no concern for the care, development, or improvement of the slave.. none of the work a Master should do. None of those hot little DS moments where its all about the control.

You know you are with a real Master or slave when 90 days later, there is still a desire to give more control, a drive to take more control.  This is the time when we see how deep the rabbit hole goes.  The truth is, we who desire this, are constantly trying to perfect our oneness.. our connection of wills..

As we drove away from our little picnic, Izrina said:  That was nice.  I said.. You have to trust that I will always do what I want.  We settled into chit chat about this and that.  I took a different way home, another little mini-adventure for our day.. no rush.  Side roads with lower speed limits.  We started to talk about the houses we passed.. which ones we like or didn’t and why.  It was a very pleasant day.

Just a few thoughts, brought on by the events of today.  Carpe Diem my friends.. be someones great day.

 

 

Crazy hours and rabbit holes

I have been working simply crazy hours.  I haven’t taken a day off in three weeks.  Hell, I was supposed to take of Friday, but then this happened and that.  Been working at the computer at home, while Izrina plays on Xbox.

I am not complaining.  I like the sense of accomplishment. I also like that Izrina doesn’t complain about the time she loses to the job.  She understands and supports what I need to do to succeed at work.

Oddly, in spite of all the time lost today, she was extremely warm.  She had that “I love you madly” vibe just oozing out of her.   When I finally got home, I collapsed on the couch, and she stroked my hair as I napped.  I had been a twelve hour overnight marathon, and a stress feast to boot.  I was nice to lie there and just soak up the love.

The other night she prepared something new and didn’t want me to peek at the ingredients while she prepared.  It was spaghetti squash.  I’ve made spaghetti squash many times, but its always vegetarian.  She made this one with a mix of veggies and crumbled hamburger.  It was delicious.

This week I’ll be away from her for a week, and frankly I am thinking I am going to have a bad case of Master withdrawal.  Thank God I’ll meet up with some kinky friends in Vegas, or I might just go mad!

Tonight I called for my smoking jacket and pipe.   At least my version of it.  I dearly love my property.  She is such a good girl… and she gets better at being a good slave, every day.

There is a line in the movie: The Matrix.. Or you stay in Wonderland and see how deep the rabbit hole goes… the BDSM life is like that.  Its a process.  Everyday we discover just a little more, how much we two can become one.  Instead of saying I love you, I often say or text 221.  It means.. two to one.. or two become one.   My will is her will, she comes more and more an extension of my plans and desires every day.  It can be a little frightening, this elimination of boundaries, but it is also incredibly satisfying and intensely powerful, this sense of oneness.

Carpe Diem my friends.. Go be someone’s great day.