Quotes by XTAC ( Ecstasy)

Last addition was in 2019, December 29th

What is quote worthy?

What makes a thing quote worthy? Like all quote worthy comments, its elegant simplicity belays the deeply profound thoughts that arise, the more you ruminate upon it. Or it is just wisdom so important, its a keeper.

Over the years I have written and spoken a lot so by shear volume I have to have said something useful a few times.  Every now and then when it happens that I think…Hey! That’s pretty good.. I write it down in my list of quotes.  Over the years, this list has gotten to be quite long, so you may not want to consume this whole thing in one bite.

That being said, two blogs ago when I listed my favorite quotes by others, I promised that I would share my own quotes list.  Now is that later I mentioned.  You may want to bookmark this page because I add to it all of the time and because once in a while, some of this stuff is an inspirational “pick me up”.  You can also find this again quickly by clicking on the “About” section at the top of any page, My Quotes are linked there.

Related:  Quotes by others

Xtac Quotes
Presented in the order they were created

I can not create a minute, even the minutes of my life belong to a higher force. The only thing I truly own, are my choices. ~Xtac Quote

I truly believe that the Ds lifestyle, if executed honorably, is a home for the heart like no other. If founded with honesty, and built with trust, and entered into with a sincere desire to serve other, each according to their sacred role, no nilla relationship can compare. ~Xtac Quote

Evil in this life is a self inflicted wound in the spiritual world” ~Xtac Quote

The strength I draw from, helps me to be supportive in a calm, reasoned, loving way, no matter how you pummel me with your needs or your pains. But that strength is a double edged sword. Just because I won’t abandon you, doesn’t mean I am weak, and it doesn’t that I will take you back if you leave. Never mistake my kindness for weakness. ~Xtac Quote

With my fist, I can only take the pleasures that are demanded or which I beat from you, and so become a slave myself. But when I take your neediness with an open hand and feed you the pleasure of your submission, I create a desire to return. This is how I become the Master. ~Xtac Quote

Explained: This is about internal slavery vs external slavery.  The Master who takes without consent becomes the slave. They are wrong, and they know it, and must forever live with the knowledge that their world is tenuously held together by force, anger and evil. They are a slave to that which is required to keep it together.  Now this is true throughout the full spectrum of consent.  At one end is the domestic abuser (external control).  At the other end is the mutually happy Ds couple (internalized control).  There is every possibility in between, but to become a Master, you must learn to internalize slavery; learn how to feed your slave on the pleasure of their own submission.

I have found, that almost every submissive has a secret key locked away in her heart and her mind, begging to be found. Any master can have her pleasures, but only a great Master can find the key, and when he does, she comes undone, but is forever more, held in the grip of the man that set her free. Given time, that Master is usually me. ~Xtac Quote

A true slave, in every fiber of their being, feels nothing without the ability to serve. Serving is happiness, and only a Master makes this possible. Serving a Master is our gift. Trusting the Master to use your service well, is your gift. ~Xtac Quote

A true slave does not give the gift of service, they give the gift of trust. ~Xtac Quote

In love, I am like a mirror. This is not a simple metaphor. It has taken me years to understand how to be a good lover. A mirror lives for interaction. When engaged, it is present, totally in the moment, and when left, does not pine or cling for the next interaction. No, a mirror is, completely content to just be, and like a mirror, when a lover comes to me, I am truth reflected, need reflected. I am all that you bring: desire, passion, compassion. I am there for, and completely with you; focused on and in that moment. There is much more, but put simply, to be a good lover, I must be a mirror. ~Xtac Quote

“Comfort the afflicted, afflict the comfortable. A creed for the responsible Sadist, if ever there was one. ~Xtac Quote (first sentence is part of a Finley Peter Dunne quote regarding newspapers)

I truly regret, there is not enough of me to go around. ~Xtac Quote

Judgement will not be passed upon you from my behavior, so stop trying to take responsibility from me. Own your own choices, prepare yourself for judgement, keep God in your way, and I’ll do the same. ~Xtac Quote

Submission is not weakness. It takes more strength to be submissive than Dominant. ~Xtac Quote

“It takes more strength to be a slave than a Master. You may disagree but it is the slave who demonstrates strength and courage with their commitment to an uncommon currency; the currency of trust, honesty, and love” ~Xtac Quote

It is strange to a Nilla, that in bondage, a slave finds freedom. But in keeping boundaries, these same people create a prison from which their hearts are never truly free. This is a sadness that pains and frustrates me. I wish they could see, what I see. ~Xtac Quote

Eternity and infinity hold all possibilities and in a state of all possibilities existing simultaneously, rationality can not function. ~Xtac Quote

A very small segment of the population understands that reality obeys the observer. That is fortunate. This knowledge was not meant for everyone. ~Xtac Quote

What everyone should do, is choose wisely, that which they focus their attention, passion, and energy upon. ~Xtac Quote

I refer to Love as a noun, but it only has real meaning as a verb ~Xtac Quote

We are all students of life. ~Xtac Quote

When pursuing the mysteries of life; seeking higher truths, remember that every real truth is a paradox. This is why, the smarter we get, the less we know. ~Xtac Quote

I must remember to be thankful you can interfere in my life. Free will enables us all to grow. Be careful how you use it, however. That sword cuts both ways. ~Xtac Quote

Great leaders (and Dominants) do not shy from conflict. They do however attempt to make the outcome of conflicts constructive, rather than destructive. ~Xtac Quote

When this is your orientation, your passion is the journey of a lifetime. We are all on different points in this journey, but we share the same road. ~Xtac Quote, speaking on bdsm

Doing the right thing, is always the right thing to do. ~Xtac Quote

What is right, is always right in front of me, if I listen. ~Xtac Quote

Truth is personal. People rarely share the same truths. This is because each of us lives in our own world. ~Xtac Quote

I find that when my choices are not aligned with my alliances, it often confuses both my friends and enemies and that is OK. Owning a decision made upon independent and original thought is never going to be easy. ~Xtac Quote

When you approach each decision upon its own merits, this results in an apparent inconsistency and that is as it should be, for real truth often seems counter intuitive. ~Xtac Quote

Figure out how your audience needs to hear your message and it will be heard. HOW you say something is nearly as important as what you say. ~Xtac Quote

Hate only hurts the one that holds it. ~Xtac Quote

The only titles of value are those acquired thru recognition by others. One claims that title by exercising that recognition, not asserting it. ~Xtac Quote

When people make decisions about what is right thought and right behavior, and construct a framework for enforcing what they believe, zealots are born. This is the cauldron from which many a poisonous religious and governmental brew is born. ~Xtac Quote

The truth is, Love and Empathy guide us to what is right, not people. The more we deviate from this truth, and the more complicated our explanation, the more likely we have let passion, blind compassion. ~Xtac Quote

It is fair and actually the most honest thought you can have, to acknowledge that every encounter between two people seeks to an exchange of some sort that is, if not equitable, then advantageous. ~xtac quote

Ethics is a way of assessing if claims of an inequitable exchange have merit, and the degree of outrage and action that should result. Morality however is bullshit. ~ Xtac Quote

Cheaters ALWAYS prosper, until they get greedy, THEN you catch them at it. ~ Xtac Quote

What people do reveals what they really think and feel. Even if we do not ignore the words and do not observe actions consciously, we still know this instinctively. This is why trust takes so long. ~Xtac Quote

Some people will say anything, its what they will do that is limited ~ Xtac Quote

Life is my spiritual path, but BDSM is how I share it. In this life, I serve by leading those who serve. I see the ying and the yang through out life and in BDSM, I can express it with passion and compassion, two sides of the same, each of us in our sacred role. ~ Xtac Quote

Many people will offer advice on what you should believe or do. Politely but firmly reject any advice you have carefully considered before. But if the advice is new, be prepared to reevaluate your thinking. Don’t allow appearing to have been wrong, to get in the way of actually being right. ~ Xtac Quote

Remember this-EVERY accusation of consent violation has a predator and a victim..every one. The real question is, who is the predator and who is the victim? ~ Xtac Quote

I am thankful for beautiful skies, my inner guide, and the universe through which I offer myself as a conduit. I am thankful for my canvas, she with whom I practice serving those who serve. I am thankful for that which gives meaning to my life.  I am thankful for those who have shared moments with me, letting me be part of their life.   As I become part of their life so too they have become part of mine.  ~ Xtac Quote, Thanksgiving 2014

Place your head before of your heart, before you place your heart before your head. Respect is not earned, its a reflection of your own values, but trust, that is earned. Once earned though, you must follow your heart. ~ Xtac Quote

Argue to the intelligence of your point not to people. If you find yourself in a cage with monkeys, what would the point be to trying to convince them to stop throwing shit? ~ Xtac Quote

I firmly believe that some sacred cows were meant to be made into hamburger before consumption. ~ Xtac Quote

You must understand that some beliefs are at war with each other. ~ Xtac Quote

BDSM is what we make of it. As we travel on this journey together, we all find what it means for us personally, what works for us, what makes us personally come alive. Where it gets interesting, is when we try to explain to others what we think and why its worth sharing. Then it gets very interesting indeed. ~ Xtac Quote

It might be said that the Utopian ideal of universal equality is a path that leads to anarchy. It is only through equality AND consent that we can happily enter into a larger group to find our place in the natural structures of power that we create together. ~ Xtac Quote

The most important part of giving, is the taking. ~ Xtac Quote

It can be terribly frustrating to have something of value to say and no one will listen. This then is the truth of giving and taking. Taking is the most important part of giving. ~ Xtac Quote

When we understand that taking is the most important part of giving, suddenly we see why a Master or Owner is important to a slave. The owner is what gives meaning to the deep and abiding need to serve. ~ Xtac Quote

If you don’t think ideas are dangerous, make a list of words ending in “ism”. Every “ism” has followers willing to bitterly fight and possibly die over words. ~ Xtac Quote

Our value is determined by what we bring to a relationship, not the relationship itself. ~ Xtac Quote

Some argue that submission does not take strength. It does. Dominance does not require strength. It requires the gentle patience to apply irresistible force to the strength of that submission, until it bends comfortably, happily, to your will. ~Xtac Quote

Hatred is a self inflicted sickness of the body and mind. If you hold hate it will grow stronger. The more you embrace it, the weaker you become. Like all sicknesses, if it is not beaten, hatred will ultimately consume its host. ~Xtac Quote

When I say stype, I am saying I know that you identify as a submissive or a slave and fit into what we all recognize as one of those labels but that I am not judging. I am removing the choice of submissive or slave so that I can have a dialog in which we better understand you without the label, how your level of submission and obedience guides your self-identity. ~Xtac Quote

What is the value of a word if that word has no value until the person using it personally defines it? Welcome to the complex world of subs and slaves. ~Xtac Quote

If a word has no meaning until the person using it personally defines it, then why even have that word in the first place? What is the value of a word that has no value? None. Words such as slave, consensual slave and submissive need definitions ~Xtac Quote

You must ever be mindful to manage the mind, not the body of the slave. ~Xtac Quote

Pick your audience. Words have cultural and emotional associations in addition to their literal meanings and connotations. Or just say fuck it, today I don’t care if the monkeys are going to fling shit ~ Xtac Quote

Carl Jung says that “where power predominates, there love is lacking.” I say: “Power without consent promotes evil, but power with consent promotes love.” ~ Xtac Quote

The highest form of society is not based on gender or equality, but on consent. ONLY when our right to consent is not suppressed, can love and power coexist within the natural systems of power all around us. ~ Xtac Quote

Only through consent can we create the opportunity to experience unbridled love and power together. ~ Xtac Quote

I am instantly suspicious of any person that seeks real power, power that cannot be contested, because I believe their personal motivations are far from altruistic ~ Xtac quote

Power exercised without consent begets evil ~ Xtac Quote

To fight evil, we must become the evil we fight. To not fight is to have the good we possess extinguished. What choice then is left to us? ~ Xtac Quote

Plans are just a framework on which life happens. Might as well enjoy the ride. ~ Xtac Quote

Adults don’t make children, children make adults ~ Xtac Quote

I do not fear death, only the pain required to pass through it. I welcome death, the moment when I can again be in the light. ~ Xtac Quote

Much in the way that a slave finds greater freedom in their chains, a thought we understand and agree upon, it too can be said that a much needed cathartic release may require the quiet aftermath of being broken, when all struggles surrender to peaceful acceptance. ~ Xtac Quote

The pleasure of slavery can not exist without consent but true slavery can not exist with consent. It would seem a paradox impossible to resolve, but it is not. ~ Xtac Quote

Serendipity happens. I often wonder why the people I come into contact with, were presented in that time and place. How will this weave into the fabric that will become the lessons of this life? ~ Xtac Quote

You can not teach orientation ~ Xtac Quote

Just remember that what you seek you will not find, but in the path of your happiness, when you are loving life the most, what you were seeking will find you. ~ Xtac Quote

Respect for diversity is good, its even better as respect for diversity of thought. ~ X Quote

Being sensitive does not entitle you to hate on the insensitive. ~ Xtac Quote

Opportunity is nothing without the will and ability to capitalize on it, and visa-versa. ~ Xtac Quote

When reaching for goals, gauge your progress by each success-no matter how small- AND each setback.  Each success tells us that if we did it once, we can do it again.  Each setback provides knowledge that puts us closer to our next success. The only real failure, is to give up. ~ Xtac Quote

Believe, or do not believe, there is no middle ground ~ Xtac Quote

The complexity of a slave’s mind or any mind for that matter, holds the fascination of this Master.. incessantly. ~ Xtac Quote

The cure for radical points of view is almost always for you to do the very thing thing you are trying to stop. ~ Xtac Quote

In every Ds relation there are three participants.. the Dominant, the submissive, and the relation. All three have needs. ~ Xtac Quote, from ideas put forth in a munch discussion.

Being a parent often means putting your children first. Good stuff to consider when negotiating a M/s relation. ~ Xtac Quote

All things in their time.. fast may win the race, but slow and steady wins it all. ~ Xtac Quote

The price of admission into my world is, at the very least, to grasp the concepts of my reality. ~ Xtac Quote

This body has been good to me but it is others who will miss it when its gone, not me. ~ Xtac Quote

What we DO in BDSM might not be for everyone, but what we know is. ~ Xtac Quote

It is by knowing that the laugh of a child, like the eclipse, is a once in a lifetime event never to be repeated in quite the same way.. that we learn to embrace each moment with equal joy and awe at the wonders large and small around us. ~ Xtac Quote after 8/21/17 eclipse

You need to understand that to love someone is to bring your happiness to them so that joy is multiplied. If you NEED someone else to find happiness, then you are sucking at them, pull all of your happiness from them like a leech, and this is destructive. ~ Xtac Quote (Added at the suggestion of slave Kit)

What you would call “good” or “bad” is often simply the objectification or your own feelings about that thing. ~Xtac Quote

You should only feel “guilty or sorry” if you consciously do something wrong. The alternative is being conscious and doing right.  Avoid at all costs simply reacting while suppressing any real thought, leaving yourself feeling conflicted. That is the path to an unhappy life.  ~ Xtac Quote

To do “wrong” is to break your person code of ethics in the pursuit of your desires.  To do “right” is to pursue your pleasure within the boundaries of your personal ethics.  The world has been and always will be in search of a universal set of ethics. ~ Xtac Quote

…to be worthy of a title like Master, you must also have a certain degree of humility, a willingness to earn recognition. ~ Xtac Quote, as recorded by Master B.

Men want a good girl who is only naughty for them, and Women want a bad boy who is always nice to them. ~ Xtac Quote -that is true more often than not..

I keep my pride in check with this mantra…”If its the truth, it ain’t bragging”. ~ Xtac Quote

It may seem weird, but you can take pride, in the fact you swallowed your pride, to be on the right side of a thing. ~ Xtac Quote


Think Clinton, or clitoris, whatever works ~Xtac Quote

  • Note: if we are friends, ask what this means, but be prepared. The explanation takes a few paragraphs. The short version is this: “Hold your head high, try to keep your dignity and sense of humor, no matter how bad it gets.”

Voting – because opinions are a curious thing!

Purpose – The link to this page will be found at the top of every post along with other useful links.  This page has one purpose.  To bring together all blogs that request your vote. That way, all past, present and future votes can be found in one place.

FUN! – I am a curious fellow.. in many ways.. but that’s a longer discussion.  For me, thinking and observing and observing and thinking about people is fun.  I write for fun, and these surveys or polls are for fun.  I could give a rat’s ass about proving a point.  I beg you to join in that fun as we explore what our lives and desires mean.  Hmm however if I knew who I was speaking to.. that request might take a more commanding tone…

PM me with suggestions! If you want to see another survey, private message me on Fetlife. I am XTAC there as well as here.

Survey 01 – Identity ResearchIs there a connection between BDSM self-identity and politics?   Help explore that question together!

Survey 02 – Sorry.. I’m busy with my slave right now.. come back later.



Transparency – To my knowledge, this is entirely anonymous.  This long-ass, boring section to designed to let you know everything I know about these polls.  I am big on transparency and earning trust, so here goes.   I have looked and can’t find anything in this WordPress tool that tells ME who voted or how.  If I find out otherwise, I’ll post that information.  That being said, the internet is funded by advertising.  I can’t promise that WordPress or some other entity isn’t interested and able to link votes to WordPress accounts. If I find out otherwise about others I’ll post that as well.  Not sure who would want to know or why but I am suspicious by nature.   Oh, also this..The totals must be in a database somewhere, but it was mentioned that your vote is held on a cookie which is why you can’t vote twice.. Cookies are stored on YOUR computer.  These cookies should expire in about a week. Good tech info for you to have.