Do you read faces?

On vacation.  This is one I wrote and never posted.. One from the can, so to speak.  I have one I really, really want to write, but we have a whole lot of fun things to do.  I’ll get to it.  It has to do with a comment by Vile, to a comment I made.  Brain is churning… Its a distraction I want to finish. In the meantime..This is one that was triggered, written, but had other things I wanted to post first… so, here’s one from the can…

A great dominant just like a great slave, reads other people well. Asperger syndrome comes with difficulty reading the non-verbal communication of others.  But nothing is impossible my friends. We can learn to read the non-verbal clues of what others are feeling and thinking.  But how can that contribute to be a better Dominant or slave?  For a Dominant, it helps you to know if you are really changing the behaviors you set out to.  For a slave it means a higher degree of confidence that your service and anticipatory service is pleasing.  Is it wildly important to be able to do this?   Probably not.  But it is helpful.

So what can you do to learn to read people better?  The secret is to practice two things – observe, and predict.  Observe a person and predict what it is that they are feeling, thinking, doing, or going to do.  Start to develop the skill of predicting what you know about a person.  This will lead to your own kind of asperger because you will often be wrong.  But the point is not to get hung up on how effective we are at reading non-verbal clues.  The point is to make a conscious effort to see if we are getting better, and then try to improve.  It is not about how good you are, its about making a conscious effort to gauge your level of improvement, to measure success in degrees.

Here is the thing.  This lesson runs all through our lives.  Never look at a project and then focus entirely on getting to the end of it.  If its giving up cigarettes, concentrate on getting through the next five minutes, then an hour, then a day.   Small victories are still victories, but a series of small victories is the key to success.  What ever your goals there will be many battles, but a battle won or loss is either a step forward, or back.  The war is never lost until you give up.  Never give up.  Move forward every day towards something.  My advice for goals is the same its always been.  Learn to be happy.  Learn to make good decisions.  These are my goals.  Every day I win some and I lose some.  But I will try to always get a little better.  On to the roller coasters!  Carpe Diem my friends!

 

4 thoughts on “Do you read faces?

  1. Oddly enough, we were just having that conversation – understanding that if we break things down it won’t seem as daunting – and always there will be some form of accomplish – even it is a small one.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. It’s not a new idea. It amazes me sometimes when I go over old writing, the things I’ve learned, forgotten, and rediscovered again. When we share as we do, sometimes this triggers new learning, and sometimes it rekindles old, sometimes in ourselves, and sometimes in others. Its one of the many values of sharing. Gad we shared a connection with this one.

    Like

  3. I was just speaking to a friend who dates a lot and every other girl , when I ask how things are going the first thing that comes out of his mouth or text is OMG she has Asperger syndrome.

    I now tend to believe he is the one with Asperger syndrome or maybe he is just that stupid and there is a cure for the first.

    I have learned over the years to sit back and observe , listen and watch. Many tend to want to jump in head first balls to the wall , get our clothes off lets fuck. Then later you find out this dude or chic is really fucked up.

    I think most anything can be controlled in the right environment and the right plan and level of thinking, kinda like playing chess.

    I also believe most Dominants are years ahead of Psychiatrists it takes years literately for a PHD to give a correct diagnosis if you read medical journals, where as a Dominant tends to be able to get a deeper sense of what is going on.

    Even with someone who suffers from Asperger syndrome in the right setting and guidance anything is possible.

    I know I get off track..

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Not off track at all. Asperger is indeed part of the comments and it highlights rather well the challenge of being able to “read” someone. I suspect that those in Ds have an advantage in that we are free thinkers, liberated from the box of conformist views. I’ve seen papers that suggest that Ds practitioners on a whole, a generally more apt to have a more stable and positive view of life and happiness.

    Liked by 1 person

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