If you are just looking for what uncommon currency is, skip to the second half of this piece. Tonight, I start with a quote
“It takes more strength to be a slave than a Master. You may disagree but it is the slave who demonstrates strength and courage with their commitment to an uncommon currency; the currency of trust, honesty, and love” ~Xtac quote
I’ve been sucked into the debate, does the slave really have all the control. Let’s not go there. Its kind of a chicken or egg came first thing. This quote is not about that debate, its about strength, not control. Its about the uncommon currency that makes equitable, our peculiar lifestyle.
I’ll avoid saying lifestyle choice, because for some of us power exchange might as well be the air we breath. I’ve sometimes referred to my lifestyle as an “orientation”. For those of us that need this and are an empty vessel without it, “orientation” feels so much more correct than just a “choice”. But I digress.
To those outside the window looking in, they see a person giving up all that are and have for another. In a very real sense, a Master receives tangible benefits that those looking on can readily see. It is the peculiar nature of some things, like love, that only those in it can see the value that exists between them. But these things we exchange are very real to us, a palpable thing that touches us deep inside.
And how could it be any other way? A slave will make of themselves a possession. Their body, mind and will becomes an extension of the will of the Master or Mistress they serve. My slave may not even say “My Master” for she can not even own that. There is no boundary, no privacy, no buffer, no space, in which to retreat. It’s a raw, open connection so deep as to be scary. Some slaves face a moment of fear, a sense that their identity is slipping away. With management, it becomes a zen thing, living in the moment, alive with the joy of the interaction that is now.
This is why I say that being a slave takes more strength. It is the commitment to pursue the incredibly big things in small moments that takes your breath away. It is the faith that when we are human and those moments seem infinitely far away, that the person you trust and have entrusted with all that you are will find the way to bring you back to your happy place.
Absolutes are concepts for fools and I don’t believe that I am such a fool as to believe that one statement about the nature of a thing can capture all people or all things. But in a general way though this quote is true and there are moments when you see and recognize that truth in beautiful epiphany.
Now.. let us dive deeper into uncommon currency itself.. what it means. I think you can get a better sense of where I am headed with this term, in my My core values and beliefs piece, but in a nutshell.
What I am saying is that a Master and slave relationship is both unequal AND equitable. A Master has all possessions and power and yet the relationship is equal in terms of what is exchanged because of our values..what we place value on.. our currency of exchange. If we think of an exchange in nilla terms, the M/s relation is NOT equitable. But because we crave either to dominate or be dominated, our personal values make it equitable.
And here is a thing..because uncommon currency is so very personal, you can’t judge another, even if you are kinky. You need to understand that only two people in a relationship, can understand themselves if the currency of exchange, that which they desire most, is being met. Yes, we are a breed apart, but I think a better breed because we have vast diversity, deep thinking about what that means, and respect for personal values that goes much farther in its way of looking at things.
So my friends, acquaintances, and playmates past and future, let us raise a toast and warm our hearts for those that go into that place with no road map, presenting all that they are as a canvas on which a Master may create a masterpiece. It takes strength to place such trust in another and to hold fast to the uncommon currency that comes of it.